Friday, January 16, 2009

Apple and the Massacre of the Innocent!

WARNING: Picture below may cause offence to the sensitive - Caution Advised!

It's Friday and this will be a very, very sad post! You see I was up till the wee morning hours and, well, I read something that was not pretty, not pretty at all. What was that, and what could I possibly be doing that would keep me up so late? Well, I have to confess - I have an addiction, a very bad addiction! No, I'm not proud of it, but like millions of other addicts, this is an addiction that, like many, is one that is hard to break.

What pray tell am I addicted to? Drugs? Alcohol? No, never in a million years - I hate those two things with a passion that is almost as great as my passion for all things Apple! No, I'm afraid .... and this is hard to admit, that yes - I'm a internet addicted! There I said it.

But what was I looking at, till the wee morning hours? Porn, maybe? Ha, ha, ha, if that was true, trust me, I wouldn't be telling you! No, unfortunately, it's a lot worse than that, because I'm also a news addict! Yes, put them together and you have a person who can easily find themselves up till the wee early hours till their as bugged-eyed as me. And when it comes to the news, well,lets all admit it, that a lot of it is very grim these days. Why, there's the horror taking place in the world's economy, the horrors of war, what's happening in Iran, terrorists and the not-so-pretty spectacle of what's happening in the world of politics, as anyone in the great state of Illinois will attest to! Surely, for goodness sake, all these things can give anyone nightmares, keeping them, in the process, up till the wee morning hours.

However, I'm afraid, that while surfing the billions and billions of web pages last night, I came across the incredibly disgusting, horrifying , mind chilling picture of extreme abuse - no, not child abuse, elderly abuse, or the never ending abuse of tax payers, but something just as bad, if not more so - the unbridled abuse of the beautiful, the sexy, the powerful - yes, Apple computers!

Ohhhhhhh......... the pain, and the horror of it all! Yes, my dear readers, all two or three of you out there, as you can plainly see from the horrifying picture below, we have a picture of totally innocent Mac computers, all new, all shiny, all so beautiful - and all so young - being abused and massacred into mindless oblivion! Oh, the inhumanity of it all! It's enough to bring tears to the eyes of anyone who loves high-tech, so please excuse.......... while I wipe my tear and blood stained eyes for just a minute!

But how could anyone be so cruel, you ask? How could anyone do such a monstrous thing? Yes, I know, it's totally unimaginable that anyone could even contemplate such barbaric acts, but the really horrid part of it all, and yes, you better sit down for this one - it was being done at the hands of mother - APPLE! Yes, my dear and precious readers, the Apple Australian unit ordered these innocent babes, these precious and expensive Mac's to be destroyed - a whopping $200,000 worth!

But why, why would a mother do that to her own newly born children? Obviously, if you ask me, someone, somewhere is totally out of their mind! I'm not a shrink, but all I know is that one of the Apple employees decided to sneak out a picture of the massacre, and thus exposing mother's dark side! Mother Apple defended herself my saying that they were too expensive to repair, but that's not what employees have said. According to a report in MacBlogz that I read, while surfing last night, and one which gave me nightmares upon nightmares, and thus helping to keep me up till the wee hours, was that one of those employees, by the name of Johnston, claimed:

"“There were up to nine pallets,” Johnston remembers, “two were of MacBooks, both Pro and 13 inch versions, two were of iMacs, two were of Mac Pro towers, one had few Xservers on it and a few Mac Pros and one had Mighty Mice and a copy of Final Cut Studio – we went as far as manually tearing up the manuals.”

Oh, my breaking heart..... the pain, the pain........ oh, the pain - I don't think I can go on, but go on I must!

And going on MacBlogz further reported:

"Upon discovering the equipment, Johnston says him and his team were surprised to discover that most of the Macs started up with no problem. “Several machines in the first batch I was involved in had emails included in the box or taped to the outside.” Allegedly, “Someone who’d been there about nine months said Apple had replaced the units because it was too expensive to send them to China for repair.”

However, Johnston claims that him and his team were instructed to destroy all of it. “The supervisor told someone to get some tools and they came back with two hammers and several screwdrivers. They wanted us to separate the two halves of the MacBooks and smash the screens of the iMacs with hammers.”

Apparently, someone who represents Apple on the site permanently gave Johnston the order to destroy the equipment. When they dumped all of the equipment into a large dumpster outside of the warehouse, people complained that it was sticking above the edge of the bin, and Johnston’s crew had to crush it down with a forklift."

What can I say? THOSE BASTARDS - they should be charged with genocide!

Yes, in a world filled with violence, there is simply no need - no reason, to abuse innocent little Mac's, especially by the hand of their own mother! This is an outrage and the people responsible should be charged, convicted and promptly sent to Gitmo for being the terrorists that they are! Isn't it bad enough that the world is full of child abusers, tax abusers, political abusers and those who abuse the elderly - do we now need to add Mac abusers to the pile? I say not! Before the new president tackles the economic crisis, before he fix's social security, or solves the middle East crisis, I say that Obama must first promptly drop everything and do something to outlaw and stamp out this abuse of innocent Mac computers immediately! Are you listening Mr. President?

Anyway, my dear, dear readers please, for heaven's sake I urge you to: write your congressman, your senator, your local, state and other federal officials, till we all rid the earth of these monsters, these scumbags, and those who would mistreat and abuse innocent little baby Mac Mini's, MacBook's and God forbid..... even genuine Mac Pro's. They were so fast, so powerful - so damn expensive! This is clearly a crime not only against innocent Mac's, but a crime against humanity, style and sheer American ingenuity! After all, these are computers that people could have used for a million different things...... playing games, downloading porn, writing computer viruses' on, cheating on their taxes, used as word processors, surfing the news - the list is endless!

Ah, what a bloody waste, what an utter shame! Why, just let me at those bastards, I'd teach you a lesson you'll never forget, you bad, rotten mummy Apple! Abuse your own children..... the nerve!

Again I ask why? Why did these poor, defenseless and innocent Mac's have to die, and to die before they even had the chance to fill up half of their hard drives? It's meaningless, it's barbaric and utterly shows the depths of depravity that the human race is capable of descending into!

May God have mercy on all of those newly deceased Mac's! May their CPU's, hard disk's, LED screens and what not, rest in peace! And as we look back on the horror of this massacre, this massacre of the innocent - may we, in turn never, ever forget!


And that's my 2 cents 4 this Friday, January 16, 2009

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